wingblossom | life in a U.S. corporation (Reply)

This is a true story of a computer programmer who worked as an independent consultant at [company name] in New York City.

The consultant has an interview with a manager on the second floor of the [company] building. He accepted the job. A few days later a second agency he worked with sent him for an interview with another manager of the same company, on the fourth floor of the same building. He accepted that job as well.

He managed to work both of these full-time, 8:00 to 5:00 jobs for over six months without anyone realizing what was going on. He would arrive early for one job, about 7:45, before anyone else got there. Then at about 10:00 he would walk down the stairs and show up for the second position, where they believed he was one of those programmers who like to work a later schedule.

He worked little more than eight hours a day but was able to bill for sixteen by convincing each department that he was working full-time just for it.

I know this is true because he was fired just a couple of weeks before I started there. A couple of employees were all shocked and told me the story over lunch. I later asked some other people about it, and they confirmed that it actually happened.

In the end he was caught when someone from one floor went to the other and saw him working there.

In summary, all of Scott Adams's tips about surviving work in corporations have to do with basically avoiding it as much as possible. Before he started publishing Dilbert, I wonder what he must have been like as a co-worker. I have a hunch that he was the understated, sensible-seeming type who people knew not to cross because they secretly suspected him of hiding either a) knives or b) top secret information sought by multiple intelligence agencies under his drawer.

This also brings me to my next point, which is that I really want to give whoever thought of The Office* a big fat kiss on the cheek and a cookie.

Well, maybe not the kiss. But definitely a cookie! It takes talent to turn the most mundane drivel into a funny, character-driven satire that manages to be as true as it is absurd. Watching the deleted scenes for s5 on Youtube today pretty much rekindled my love for it, and reminded me that I haven't seen any new episodes in a while.

It also reminded me that some people are just obnoxious, because one of the outtake vids posted up there tries to rickroll everyone. Yeah.

I think this post was supposed to have more of a point (like linking to some of my favorite moments from The Office, for example) or reveal some insight of scintillating brilliance. But sleepiness prevails yet again, so if anything, that's going to have to wait until tomorrow.

*Yes, I know it's Ricky Gervais.